We don’t get asked a whole lot of questions around here. But sometimes, we do. Here are those questions, and what we say to the people asking them.

1. Why is your website called Okay City?

It’s a pun, and I agree with you that it’s lame. I was raised in Oklahoma, and after quite a lot of time away living in other states and countries, I moved back here in 2002. The "Okay" part is more a nod to the fact that my city, and my life in that city, are pretty awesome, but that they could always use some improvement. Also, if you’ve ever spoken to me, you know I begin almost a full third of my sentences with "Okay…"

2. Why the hell do you live in Oklahoma? What’s wrong with you?

My main reason for living in Oklahoma is that my family is here, and when I dropped out of Yale Divinity School in 2002 I needed to be around my family. Also, I’ve got some wonderful friends here, most of whom I’ve known for at least a decade, and in 2005 when I met the world’s greatest man I figured that wherever he was was where I needed to be as well. So, I suppose what’s wrong with me is that I like having people around me who care about me, and if that means I’m not as cool as you, well then I’m deeply, deeply sorry.

3. Don’t you know that Jesus is so super pissed that you’re gay?

I do know that, but Jesus and I had a twenty-year-long talk about it, and he assured me that it’s cool. If you would like to discuss this further you may e-mail me, but I’ll just truncate it by saying that I’ve read all the books you could possibly recommend me, and unless you’re willing to read the books I’d recommend you, and to be nice about the whole conversation, let’s just save ourselves the trouble, won’t we? Especially if you’re 17 years old, or Fred Phelps, or if the only people you know at all are the people who go to your church and live in your suburb. But just so we’re clear: Jesus is also so super pissed that I don’t vote Republican, I eat organic and locally-grown vegetables, I have tattoos, I consume alcohol, I curse like a sailor with Tourette’s, I throw away religious tracts (the ones that aren’t funny), I use a Mac, I don’t shop at Wal-Mart under any circumstances, and I don’t think America is the infallible savior of the world. Because, as we all know, Jesus is a white, American, Republican, jingoistic, pro-big-business, teetotaler whose values are right in line with your own common sense, and who thus never challenges you.

4. What kind of camera do you use?

My main camera is a Canon Rebel XTi with a Tamron 18-200mm lens. For more casual or on-the-sly shooting I used to have a Panasonic DMC FX-01 that took lovely little videos and could be easily smuggled into a concert. It’s dead now. My first digital SLR was a Nikon D50 that I borrowed from my office.

If I’m somewhere without a camera, I’ll snap photos with my iPhone, which, for a camera phone, takes wonderful pictures that tend to be a little glowy. None of my photographs would be possible, however, without the magic that is Photoshop and my willingness to take a whole lot of bad images to get me to that one really good picture.

5. "You’re site is stupid and I think your stupid."

That’s not really a question, but thanks! If you’re looking for a much better site than this one, may I first recommend Grammar Girl’s Quick and Dirty Tips For Better Writing. Then, you may read any of the sites in my links, all of which, I promise, are at least as good, if not better, than this one.

6. Do you have a MySpace or Facebook account?

I have Facebook,  but that’s one little corner of the web I like to use to keep up with people I actually know, if you don’t mind. No offense or anything, and honestly, if you’re crafty enough you could probably find me there. In which case I suppose you’re welcome to add me. And if you came here because of the links on my profile – welcome! And if you think you’re too cool for social networking sites, then that’s just another in the long list of things we don’t have in common. I’m not too cool for anything, and I suspect that neither are you.

7. How do you design this site? Who does all the work?

Mostly, I do all the design and Brian does all the heavy lifting, technically speaking. Translated, that means that I tell him what I want things to look like and he makes it happen. 

I design all the mastheads and choose the colors of the website to go along with it, a process I repeat every month or so. For that task I use Photoshop CS2 and a Coppermine Photo Gallery attached to this site. The blog is created and designed with WordPress 2.3 and hosted at HostGator. I’ve actually seen the server where this site is hosted in person, and if it hadn’t been a huge no-no, I’d have snapped a photo of it.

As for hardware, I use an Apple MacBook that is a little over two years old, which has been upgraded with a 250GB Western Digital hard drive and 2GB of RAM, both of which were lovingly and patiently installed by my incredibly kind other half. Brian uses an Apple MacBook Pro, and in case of emergency we do have an old iBook in our house that once drank an entire liter of water WITHOUT TAKING A SINGLE BREATH.

Seriously, guys, when you go looking for The One, make sure that behind the pretty face is a brain that, were it any smarter, would be capable of bending spoons. That’s what I got, and on top of that? He’s incredibly nice, and really cute. Whole package.

8. Your site looks like crap. Also, I happen to be using Internet Explorer. Discuss.

That’s because you’re an idiot, and you’re using a horrible browser that was created by Satan while he molested children. You should stop being a moron and download a better browser. Like this one.

9. What do your tattoos mean?

Right now, I have two tats, one on the underside of each forearm. The first one, which I got in July 2006, is a triquetra:

The triquetra is a Celtic symbol that originated with the druids. When Christianity came to Ireland, the meaning was transformed to stand for the Holy Trinity. I lived in Ireland for a summer and came to deeply love the culture and people and their expressions of faith. So when I went to get my first tat, I chose this.

My second tattoo, which I got on October 31, 2006 (the last day tattooing was illegal anywhere in the U.S.), is the Hindu symbol Om:

Which stands for, among other things, the all-encompassing mystical truth in the Upanishads. Also, in the Advaita strands of Hinduism, it stands for three subsumed into one, which is a common theme in Hinduism and Christianity. Note the three curves in the main part of the symbol. While it does not represent the spiritual tradition of which I am a part, it does remind me that I do not have all the answers, and that humility is the greatest spiritual discipline I can (try to) practice. I think it’s kind of neat that two completely divergent, geographically dissimilar religions have this same theme of God’s three personalities unified into a single, unknowable whole.

10. Your dog is pretty. What kind of dog is he? Where did you get him?

Sam is mostly a golden retriever, but upon examination from a representative of the retriever rescue organization here in Oklahoma City, it appears he has some Brittany and Cocker Spaniel in him. Also, if the receptionist at his vet’s office is to be believed, he’s a reincarnated human, AND SHE’S NOT EVEN HINDU.

Sam was a stray I met on the campus of the university where I work. He was without tags, and after a visit to the vet’s office determined that no one had cared for him properly in quite some time, I decided that he’d come live with us, where he has been deeply, deeply tolerated ever since. You can read about the day Sam came to live with us here.

11. I wholeheartedly disagree with your political and/or religious views. Also, I think you’re a douche bag. Should I start a respectful conversation in your comments, or just call you names on my site?

Mah, either is fine, really. Though I think that if you call yourself a Christian, or you don’t call yourself a Christian but want to get up in the morning, look yourself in the mirror, and say, "I’m a nice person. I’m a good person," then the second option is kinda out. Don’t you think? Just remember this: if you make a comment on this site, that means I have your e-mail address. And if you call me names on my own website, I’ll probably leave it up for the whole world to see, but I might also subscribe you to the "Gay Porn of the Day" e-mail list, then e-mail the Jehovah’s Witnesses and tell them that you need to have a long, protracted talk about your personal salvation. At your home. For HOURS. And if you call me names on your website, well. It’s the internet. What the cock do I care?

12. How did you and Brian meet?

Brian and I knew of each other for a couple years before actually meeting. After getting to know one another through GCN, we became friends. One day someone asked me, "Does Brian have a boyfriend? Because I’m thinking of asking him out." And my blood boiled with the heat of a thousand suns and the anger of a million Ann Coulters. That’s how I knew it was love. You can read more about how we got together here.

13. Would you like to know more about how to enlarge your penis? How about free klonopin?

No, and no. And not that spammers read this section of the site, but if you do: seriously? You think I’m going to let comments about discount online pharmacies fill up my comments and eat my bandwidth? You’re fighting a losing battle here. Move along. 

14. Where do you get off saying such mean things about Christians? Do you think God is pleased by what you’re doing?

I have no idea whether God is pleased by this website, and I don’t think you do either. As far as the mean things I say about Christians, well, keep in mind while reading this site that I am a Christian, and that, like any other group, religion, affiliation or hobby (for some people, being a Christian is a hobby, let’s face it), it’s neither perfect nor above criticism. Nobody’s harder on the church than God, after all. Read your Bible. This might also be the place to point out that nobody comes off looking worse on this website than I do, and I’m here voluntarily! What’s your excuse?