Saturday, January 19, 2008 | by nathan
Cloverfield
Cloverfield
About six months ago I saw this killer trailer for this awesome-looking monster movie. I’m sure you’ve seen it. I’ve been dying to see Cloverfield since before I knew what it was called, or who was in it. Fact is, I really like J.J. Abrams’ work to date, and Drew Goddard wrote the thing, and I love that guy’s work on Buffy, Angel and Lost.
So Brian had a brain-flash that we should make seeing this movie a date event. We had dinner at the Paseo Grill, then went to the theater.
The movie was fantastic. A lot of people are going to hate it. They’re going to cite the shaky, Blair-Witch-esque camera work and the fact that a muscly guy never jumps out, throws the monster down and beats its ass. Those people are missing some seriously key components of good storytelling.
What was not amazing? There were people in the theater who literally talked EVERY SINGLE MINUTE OF THE MOVIE.
This makes me crazy.
Once, I was in a movie and the woman in the seat in front of me took a call on her cell phone. She talked, in her normal voice - not a whisper - for five full minutes. I kicked the back of her chair as hard as I could. People talking in movies makes me absolutely, completely crazed. I got an hour into the film before I realized I was biting down as hard as I could on the inside of my cheek, which is now swollen and was bloody all last night. I kept wanting to stand up and shout, at the top of my lungs, "SHUT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK UP!" Except, you know - restraint.
The second the film ended - I mean, in that instant between the fading out of the last shot and the start of the credits, some guy goes, as loud as he could, "Are you fucking kidding me?"
NOBODY CARES WHAT YOU THINK, DUDE.
Here’s what’s interesting: apparently this is a widespread phenomenon. Wil Wheaton has blogged about how many people he knows have had their enjoyment of this specific movie ruined by movie-talkers.
I’m still pretty pissed about it; my anger is only really tempered by the fact that it was a really brilliant movie. As someone who suffers motion sickness I can understand why a person might not like it, but I’m planning on seeing it again, mid-afternoon on a weekday, and this time, I’m bringing my gun.
| It's Not Right But It's Okay, Movies |
Comment by Kevin
I’m first of all ready for Warren Theatre to open in Moore. I understand on weekends after like 8:30 they are 18+. That would delete most of my annoyance. Little dumb ass girl kept repeating “Its a __________” over and over (ask me and i’ll tell you what she was saying)
And then just people talking and at the end the general mumbling of “what the fuck?!”
20 January 2008 3:07 am
Comment by indigo bunting
You are not alone in this. I know more than one person who will hardly ever go to the movies because of this. It’s absolutely insane.
Out here in the sticks, I actually don’t have to deal with this behavior often. I made the mistake of going to see Spiderman on opening night, though, and then was brutally reminded that teenagers don’t come to the movie to see the movie. Never again.
Although it’s pretty clear that adults are some of the worst offenders.
20 January 2008 4:02 pm
Comment by CGHill
I just hope he brings enough rounds. He doesn’t have to shoot all the blabbermouths: just enough of them to get the attention of the rest of them.
20 January 2008 9:01 pm
Comment by palinode
My Cloverfield experience was marred by a packed theatre full of morons. I don’t know what they thought they were watching, but apparently they couldn’t connect the title card (the “tape found in area formerly known as Central Park” bit) with the notion that the characters die. Is it not possible to hold a crucial piece of information about a film in your head for 75 minutes? Is it so terrible that a military scientist doesn’t show up, explain everything and then kill the monster with a special monster gun? Ye gods.
As for people talking over Drew Goddard’s scripts, I say: don’t interrupt your betters.
24 January 2008 12:41 am
Comment by palinode
I also hate people who inadvertently post spoilers about movies. Like I just did in my last comment. Apologies to all who read that one.
24 January 2008 12:50 am
Comment by Bridgete
I watched it for the first time at a friend’s house while slightly drunk. It gave a new edge to the WTF confusion I’m sure I probably would have already felt. But I think I need to watch it again without the alcohol.
On that note…I agree about people talking in movie theaters. Why did you spend $8 for your ticket if you’re not going to watch?
Anyway…I like your blog. Although I’m trying to find how to RSS feed it and I’m getting confused…I’m used to Blogger.
20 August 2008 7:37 pm