Currently Reading
My Photos
www.flickr.com
Okay City on Facebook

Tuesday, October 31, 2006 | by nathan

Psychosomatic, Part 2

I have the stomach flu. I went to Goddard Health Center – you gotta love health insurance that makes you start your journey to wellness at STUDENT HEALTH – and a doctor who was MY AGE asked me a ton of questions, felt me up, and informed me that, yes, I have the stomach flu.

Brian is out of town all this week. He’s going to be in Maine, and then he’s flying to California. He will get back on Friday. So, you know – GREAT TIME TO GET SICK.

I’m going to try to feel better by tonight, because I’m really looking forward to handing out candy, and yet I don’t want to spread stomach flu to all the neighborhood kids. And I REALLY want to dress up as Jerri Blank. We’ll just see how I feel. 

Health Comments (0) |

Monday, October 30, 2006 | by nathan

Psychosomatic?

I got to my car today only to discover that all of my tax decals had been ripped off my license plate. For you non-Oklahoma residents – here in the Land of the Sweeping Wind we pay tax on our cars yearly, and they give us tiny little thumb-sized decals to put on our license plates. Without one you are subject to getting stopped by a police officer at any time and given a ticket. Today – or more likely, sometime either last night or last week – all of mine were torn from my car.

Shouldn’t be a problem – I can just go to the tag office and ask them for another one. But it’s irritating as hell.

Last night I was so dreading coming to OU today that I started to feel all weepy and sad. Today, I feel completely sick to my stomach, feverish, ready to hurl. I can’t help but think that it’s stress, but I am totally unsure as to what to do about it. 

Health, It's Not Right But It's Okay, School Comments (0) |

Friday, October 27, 2006 | by nathan

I Must Remember…

My good friend Liz has been in town this week. I haven’t been able to see her, as she is the maid of honor in a wedding, and that is worse than having a full-time job and two highly colicky, crack addicted babies. Today, however, I managed to finagle a lunch party of sorts, with Liz, and our friends Adam, Todd, Laurie, and Jaye. We met at my favorite restaurant, and they are some of my favorite people, and the whole thing was so oddly perfect as to leave me grinning like an idiot for most of the meal.

Liz and I like to joke around with each other. She is highly animated and sometimes lacks an inside voice, and we often come to blows. Not actual blows meant to hurt, mind you – friendly, playful abuse. We came to that today in the restaurant, and I sure did sprain my thumb punching her too hard. I socked her in the side – gently – and heard and felt a pop, and a tear, and now my entire left hand is an a great deal of pain. I am fairly certain it’s not broken, as I have a range of motion that is inconsistent with a fracture, but GOD DAMMIT it hurts.

I really must remember to stop punching my friends. Even when they ask for it. Right, Julian? 

Fambly, Health Comments (0) |

Wednesday, October 25, 2006 | by nathan

Small. Ish.

When I was a kid, I used to forget things, like, all the time. At my elementary school in western Oklahoma they started imposing limits on how many times you could forget your lunch ticket before you just had to sit there and not eat specifically because I kept forgetting my lunch ticket. I would get home and completely blank on the fact that I had homework due, or a project. My parents would call and ask me to do some specific chore and before we were even off the phone, my mind had erased the information almost completely.

I have not entirely grown out of it, but I have learned that it helps me to write things down, that the tactile sense of putting pen to paper will make my brain file the information in a more often accessed spot, rather than with my memories of all my sixth grade teachers’ names and whether or not I liked them.

Now that I am a graduate student, I have to constantly write things down, because there is a lot to remember, especially with teaching AND taking classes, and working 25 hours a week at a whole other job at a whole ‘nother university. A LOT to remember.

I am at a point now where I know if someone told me something or not. I know because when I am reminded of something I forgot, a familiar sense of dread fills me and the memory of being told the thing flashes before my eyes. When I was not told a thing, no memory happens. Just a vague sense of dread, then the wonder: did I space out when I was being told? Then the certainty: no, I did not.

So when someone tells me he told me several times to do something, and why the hell didn’t I do it – well, after spending about four seconds feeling three inches tall, I just get mad and explain that, no, you didn’t. You never told me anything of the sort. Then I go about my day.

Because life is just too goddamn short, you know? 

Everyday, It's Not Right But It's Okay Comments (0) |

Monday, October 23, 2006 | by nathan

9,940 Words

When I used to write piddling little columns for the Old Gold and Black in college, I never edited myself. I’d come from a high school where – not to blow my own horn or anything, but – I was praised by teachers and peers for being a pretty good writer. I took honors and AP classes, where passing that stupid AP test was the most important thing, and as such we learned to write well and quickly, but not to edit.

So when I wrote my ridiculous columns in the OGB I would write them, read them once – sometimes – and email them off. And oh, my, did I write some terrible, terrible columns. Same sitch in 2002, when I started writing QAF: write, read once (maybe), email. Very little editing. I’d catch typos later on the web and beg Justin to fix them, which he would, dutifully.

Since I have started earning a master’s degree in professional writing I have learned more about editing than I ever wanted to know. Not just how to copy-edit, which is simple, and which I learned in junior high journalism. I learned how to edit my work to make it better, to look over my own writing with a cold eye and say things the way they needed to be said. I love doing it now, and I think my work is a million times better for it. Now, when I write QAF, I sit down on one day and get everything out that I want to say. Then I leave it, and the next day I go back and force the whole thing into 1,500 words. I cut away the fat, I close up rabbit trails, I bring down plates I shouldn’t be trying to spin.

It’s become much tighter, much better. I’m writing work with which I am consistently pleased, and this means I will not have to take up drugs anytime soon.

So I’ve taken on a new project recently: the x365 project, which I’m really enjoying. This dude named Dan wanted to mark his 40th birthday by doing something special, and so he decided to write 40 words about 365 people who had touched his life. Now a whole bunch of people have joined in. The general rule is that you make a list of 365 people who have touched your life. You have to have met them in person – it can’t be a historical figure like your great-great-great-great grandmother, whose story you love, but whom you never met. Dan decided that he had to remember the person’s name; I threw that rule out for myself, because I have some wonderful stories of people who have changed my life, but whose names I do not remember – one-off interactions and the like.

Anyway, every day for a year, you write a certain number of words about each person on your list. Most people, myself included, are using their age – so, on Day 1, I wrote 26 words about my friend Dylan. Day 2 was 26 words about Jay, my old boss at Wake Forest, and so on. I flirted briefly with using only 1 word per person, but I think the words I use for people I don’t like would become monotonous. 

Anyway, I’ve been compiling the whole thing in a Word document for over a week, and I’ve been in two minds as to whether to post it to this site. Since I started this whole blogging business in earnest in 2004 I have found that it is fraught with peril; people find this blog whom I would rather not, and I get in all kinds of trouble for saying all kinds of things. This site has never been exactly what I thought it would be, but I have kept it up, often to my own detriment. Now I’m a week into the x365 thing, and I think I am going to post it. I just told my friend Leah about it, and she is thinking about doing it too, which I think is fantastic. The more the merrier, right?

What’s fun about it is trying to condense an entire relationship, a whole interaction often spanning years, into 26 tiny little words. (And yes, when I turn 27 I will add a word. But that’s not for 9 more months.) You have to tighten your language. Every word has to mean something. It’s wonderful.

I have become addicted to 5 different blogs that feature this project, and I’m really enjoying reading little blurbs about people I’ve never met. I hope you will too. 

Interweb, Writer, x365 Comments (4) |

Thursday, October 19, 2006 | by nathan

When You Work From Your Home, and Johns Call on the Phone…You’re A Call Girl

So I’ve decided on my Halloween costume. The title of this post is a clue. Here is another one.

Also, I’ve started my own x365 project, but I’m in two minds about whether or not to publish it here; I’m pretty sure it will cause drama of some kind, and I’m just not sure I want to deal with that. I am enjoying the hell out of writing it, though, and I look forward to working on a new one every day. So we’ll see. Feedback is welcome.

Sweeeet, Writer Comments (0) |

Tuesday, October 17, 2006 | by nathan

Wherein My Little Hello Is Returned Unto Me

So I just had a phone call with Chambers where he told me that someone told him at his job that they were reading all about him on this website. Here and I thought I really was just masturbating all over the internet, speaking into the void and not being heard.

Now I feel kinda like the Who that got through to Horton

So I will try to be a bit more regular with this whole business, though you may take that as a promise of nothing. I am considering taking part in this little exercise, but I am fraught with distress at the thought of it, and for more reasons than I care to list. Unfortunately, I also think it could be not only an incredibly fun, but an incredibly useful writing exercise for me. Problem is, someone I can’t stand is doing it already, and I don’t want to go there.

At any rate, I figure if I’m so bored with the Internet – when will we get another haunted bear to shake us up a bit? – I might as well try to do something to make my little corner of it more exciting, or at least stop complaining. And when have you ever known me to stop complaining? 

Interweb Comments (0) |

Saturday, October 14, 2006 | by nathan

Fair Warning (Jingle Bells)

So I’ve started planning a Christmas party. You’re invited.

Last week at Target I bought a set of skull bobble-head lights to start decorating the house for Halloween. I think I’m going to spend a fair bit of today trying to find a costume. This holiday season is going to be the best ever for everyone. Do you understand me? If I have anything to do with it, and if you know me, you’re going to be so goddamn fucking merry that you won’t fricking know what to do with yourself. You got that?

The kicker: we’re giving presents that are not over-the-top or bank-breaking, and we’re not asking one another beforehand what we want and then going out and getting that exact thing. We’re going to surprise each other with unassuming presents so as not to be stressed out. Got it? We’re going to sit together, watch "24 Hours of A Christmas Story" on TNT and football, and we are goddamn well going to give thanks for one another’s company and love. DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?

I am going to be annoyingly cheery. I am going to be baking like a busted Stepford Wife, and you are not going to whinge about your diet and how the holidays stress you out. You are going to come to my party and drink white hot chocolate and eat cookies and enjoy yourself. It’s going to be the best Christmas ever, because I decided today that life is just too damn short for everyone to stress about the holidays. We’re going to enjoy them, okay? And if that means not getting presents, fine – that’s just not what it’s about.

So put your fricking jingle bells on standby, kids, because I am not going to warn you again: I AM GOING TO BE UNBEARABLY JOLLY THIS CHRISTMAS SEASON AND YOU HAD BETTER BE, TOO.

‘Kay? Kay. Glad we got that all straightened up. Now, excuse me: I have to go see if that Wonder Woman costume at Target will fit me. 

Sweeeet Comments (2) |

Tuesday, October 10, 2006 | by nathan

Bored With the Internet, Part Deux

Okay, Internet. I’ve had it.

I just got a call from my good friend Jaye, who remarked that he, too, is bored with the internet. There’s just never anything to read, we lamented to one another over the phone. It doesn’t hold our interest like it once did.

I imagine that once the novelty wore off television people started to find it boring, too; perhaps after 15 or so years the Internet has reached a crossroads wherein its mere existence is no longer enough to sustain its likeability. It needs enlightened, creative people to come to it and create wonderful content.

And so I put the challenge to you, Internet, and to your users: what’s some good stuff that is out there that I’m not seeing? I want COMMENTS on this one, people, with links. You have yet to let me down, Internet – you know, except for the stealing what probably ALREADY amounts to a year or two of my life. I want to know where your creative, your talented, your off-the-wall, your fascinating and your intelligent things are THAT I CAN’T FIND IN OTHER MEDIA.

I’m really rooting for you here. 

Interweb Comments (1) |

Monday, October 9, 2006 | by nathan

“She Has A Pleasant Phone Voice.”

As almost any journalist will tell you, writing headlines is just about the worst, stupidest, and most difficult thing to do. At least, it is for me, and it is for most of the print journalists I know.

Our magazine project at work is winding down – finally – and one of our most long-procrastinated tasks is writing 50-some-odd three-word headlines for our series of 100-word profiles on various alumnae. Trying to sum up these women in three words is a bit like saying the Iraq War was "a bad bet." Some of the headlines write themselves, because some of the women are articulate and funny and gave us wonderful quotes. Others are easy because some of the women have cool jobs or interesting positions.

But some of the women are boring, their lives are boring, their quotes are boring, and their jobs are boring, and I’ve been using filler headlines to assist my sometimes less-than-creative brain. Some examples:

"She Was Mean To Me On The Phone."

"Eric Took Her Picture."

"A Woman’s Place Is In The Home."

"The Season Premiere of Drawn Together Wasn’t Funny."

"She Can Bite Me."

"Hi, I’m Mrs. Bill Johnson." 

Everyday, Writer Comments (0) |

Next Page »

Currently Listening

Runner-Up!